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Let's take a stroll down memory lane to see how a Frum Jew looks when vacationing, admiring Frum toilets, while David complains about children giving Tzedakah with the Kibbitzer's pictures of laughter from last month. We want to thank David Kilimnick for complaining about Mitzvot and boardgames that teach Mitzvot.
Giving Tzedakah, I like to know where the charity is going. That charity box in the front is for kids who need help with their artwork... Very poor artistic ability expressed in Jewish Day Schools, as seen with nuts on a slab of wood making a Chanukiah.
Bothersome. The prayer puzzles are a bit much when you’re teaching the kid the bedtime Shema and he has to do a puzzle at the same time. It’s impossible to fall asleep... The Mode Ani kid is filling up that bowl too much. There is no way he is not spilling that all over the house when he wakes up. And the true lesson is only boys have to do Mitzvahs.
A toilet that’s ready for Shabbis... If you never clogged a toilet, you haven’t kept Shabbat right.
A Frum tourist. That’s the look... shorts, Tzitzis out, and a baseball hat so people can’t figure out I’m Jewish. Next vacation we will be sporting the Frumer tourist look of black pants, a polo shirt, Tzitzit out and a baseball hat... The shorts are a dead giveaway I'm Jewish, with the extremely white legs.
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The Torah gives a list of birds a Jew can’t eat. Why? Because they’re foul. You get it? The Torah is talking about fowl. As in birds. We changed it to foul. As in, smells bad or disgusting. Who wants to eat foul birds. Not healthy. We care about health at the Kibbitzer. You also don’t want to eat nonKosher fowl. That’s foul. 
That is a religious sink. I know this because there are no paper towels. Just a towel that everybody else used. You use a communal towel and as your hands should be clean for Davening. A communal towel and no soap.
Show was amazing... Looking forward to sharing laughs with your community. Shoot an email to [email protected] to bring David out for laughs and song.
Rambam (negative Mitzvah 165) learns from (Vayikra 10:7) Moshe telling Ahron he can’t leave the Ohel Moed that Kohens can’t leave the Temple during services. Kohens in my shul are stringent with this law. They don’t show up. I’ll explain. They never leave the sanctuary. They’re never there.
The Torah continues “and they did as Moshe said.” Because they didn’t have a Haftorah back then, which is the perfect time to leave and get some schnapps. If they would’ve had Chivas and Jack. Categories
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The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire written by David Kilimnick and poorly edited by David Kilimnick.
So, blame his pseudonyms.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to share ideas, make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire written by David Kilimnick and poorly edited by David Kilimnick.
So, blame his pseudonyms.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to share ideas, make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
3/15/2024
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