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Let's take a stroll down memory lane back to Israel with the Kibbitzer's pictures from last month. We want to thank David Kilimnick for sharing what he's done for decorum in the Holy Land.
The anti-Semites in the airport were looking at us like we were doing a ritual sacrifice. I will admit that the Tallit colors didn't speak to the South Africans... Boarding killed my Amidah. My connection with H' during the silent prayer would have been much better if the plane was delayed.
No mask protest in Israel, and everybody is wearing masks. That's how we protest our government. It's a protest with consent. We let them know we're against them, while showing agreement... I love protests. Protests are festivals for the poor. Right there is a guy teaching his son how to play an instrument when dad has no money.
We don't think the waiter knew he was working a wedding… They must not tell you what gig you're working in Israel. The photographer had on a tank top. The DJ had on a tank undershirt... Maybe they don’t know people wear suits to weddings. Somebody must’ve told that waiter to make sure he has an undershirt. He didn’t know to throw a button-down on top of it… The photographer did make his way into a few pictures. His sidekick got him in the background, looking like a guest that forgot his shirt and jacket... Maybe he was told he’s working a concession with plated service.
Those are millennials. You can see by the way they're sitting in a circle and talking. They're learning Torah and smiling. Definitely millennials. They’re coming up with new commentaries. People who sit in circles and smile create new ideas. Smiles of heresy. (Photo: Laura Turbow- Kevah Teacher Training)
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If somebody at the Seder tells you the salt water is low in sodium, take it with a grain of salt. You get it? Salt has sodium. So, take more salt. Whatever you need to do to make the Seder more meaningful, by making things harder to eat, do it. We bring our puns to add to your Passover experience. If you’re the one who made the salt water, you can share the joy of Mordechai’s pun, while handing someone a grain of salt. When delivering puns, always ask, “What would Mordechai do?” Oh. "Take it with a grain of salt" means don't take it to heart. Now you get the pun. 
I did not clean that shelf last year. The mushrooms might not be fresh. Yet, that can is sealed nice and tight. I am at an impasse… Thank Gd for Pesach. I’m must’ve not got to that cupboard since 2008.
That’s why those cans are good. They remind you how long it’s been since you cleaned. 
Click on the picture for tickets to share laughs with David Kilimnick in Jerusalem on Thursday, February 12th
Due to leaving Mitzrayim in haste, we are commanded to eat Matzah, a “poor man’s bread” (Devarim 16:3). I am fulfilling that Mitzvah. After purchasing Shmura Matzah, I’m out of money.
Let me explain. Though it's a poor man's bread, Shmura Matzah can be very expensive. The boxed machine Matzah, sold at a dollar-fifty a pound, is probably what the Torah was talking about. Categories
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The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire written by David Kilimnick and poorly edited by David Kilimnick.
So, blame his pseudonyms.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to share ideas, make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire written by David Kilimnick and poorly edited by David Kilimnick.
So, blame his pseudonyms.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to share ideas, make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
3/10/2022
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