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Let's take a stroll down memory lane back to Tu BShvat and Shabbat Kiddish with the Kibbitzer's pictures from last month. We want to thank David Kilimnick for sharing what he's done for Kiddish development around the globe.
I love Kiddish in quarantine. I took a piece of cake and everybody said the rest was mine. Something about me touching it. I was happy. I'm going to touch more stuff at Kiddishes. I also drank straight from the bottle... The miracle is how I ate while still being socially responsible, with my mask on.
The gentile oranges, 9.99 shekels... Now Jews are down on Israeli produce too? We can't even believe in our own farmers? I understand the laws of the seventh year, but that just looks like branding against Israelis. The sign basically says, ‘Jews didn’t touch it. Don’t worry. It’s non-Jewish oranges. They’re better. Jews didn’t ruin them.’ It should be, 'We like our produce too. But we also support non-Jewish oranges when it's easier for Halacha (Jewish law). Not working the field is too big of a pain…’ I personally feel we have to stop the religious anti-Israel, Shmita BDS movement.
That's how real Charedim, ultra-Orthodox, go swimming. Full suit and hat. If you've seen Frum Jews in bathing suits, you can appreciate the Bekishe swimsuit apparel. It should be Halacha (law) to have to wear full body coats into the water. The black hat also keeps out the sun. That's Pikuach Nefesh, saving a life... Nothing like the Israeli all man beach to find people that just love to swim. You focus on the swimming, you don’ have to see that guy standing there… Israelis have mastered the art of the budget vacation and sleeping on the beach. You can see how they use the pergola to hang their clothes... That dad is happy because he's vacationing right near his home. He's not getting hit by any sun and he doesn't have to pay for anything; that's how religious Jews vacation. And that is what makes Israel great. (Credit: Alex Levac- Haaretz)
I found this book in a Jerusalem used bookshop. It reads, 'Dear Sam...'?! Why is the book not in Sam's home? Sam thought that the English readers of Israel wouldn’t find it, but we did Sam. 'Hope this book keeps you laughing...' I will laugh for you, Miller. I don't downsize friends, like Sam. Shame on Sam. I'm not very impressed with Sam right now. Sam has no heart. You don't recycle friends like that, Sam!!! In a used bookshop?! Like a used friend. Is that what you do with your friends, Sam? Use them?! I hope Sam gets this message. [Kibbitzer Note: We're not trying to put used book stores out of business. We just feel that books with personal notes should not be for resale, even if they broke up.]
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Why did the Jews working in Jerusalem wear denim? They were Levis. You get it? Levi’s. Levis. Levi’s are jeans, made out of denim. Do Levites wear jeans when working in construction. I would like to think they wear jeans when putting up buildings. 
The plastic Jewish diet spoon. I got it from the caterer who didn’t have enough cake. The spoon did make the souffle look bigger... Since using it for breakfast, I've taken off a lot of weight. I have noticed it now takes longer to eat cereal. And most of the time, the Golden Grahams fall off the spoon, helping with more weight loss. A quite utilitarian utensil.
That other spoon is the old spoon I used to use. It held the cereal and I ate. I'm not going to use that again. 
David Kilimnick - Israel's "Father of Anglo Comedy" (JPost) is not touring with his Israel solidarity show. Bring David to your community, college campus, shul, home, to share laughs of Jewish unity... 585-738-9233 [email protected]
Rambam Hilchot Rotzeyach (11:4-5) teaches that one who puts themselves in danger is violating the positive commandment of (Decarim 4:9) "Beware of yourself and guard your soul." Thus, it is important to not deal with congregants. As they can be very annoying. As with a deep hole, one should put a fence around the congregation, at least ten handbreadths high, so they stay away from you.
One must also not put themselves in a danger when traveling. Thus, one mustn’t travel to date, as that can lead to marriage. Categories
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The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
2/3/2022
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