Sermons of Rebuke III: VaYigash

by Rivka Schwartz

Announcements
We still care about Israel. Thought people should be reminded.
 
The Bergstein Bat Mitzah will have Kichel. That’s it. Even though they are not paying for anybody to enjoy themselves, the Bergsteins said they’re proud of their daughter.
 
The rabbi will be giving a course in Israel Advocacy. He asks that Bernie not come. Anything Bernie represents will not be good. People will hate it. As advocacy is supposed to be positive for Israel, the rabbi is urging only non-members of the congregation to come. To quote: ‘I believe it will be better for Israel if people advocating are people that are liked. Members of our shul are urged to not speak out on behalf of Israel. We gave seen the hatred you have already caused in our community.’
 
Asarah BTevet is a fast day. You fast on it.
 
The youth leader wants to apologize for the kids coming into shul before Kiddish. They didn’t mean to shock the congregation with youth. She said that she will do her job and keep the children from praying anything more than Adon Olam and Yigdal out of a book with pictures.

Rabbi Mendelchem's Drasha Excerpts
Shabbat Shalom My People...
Yehuda came to Yosef... If you came to me with a normal question, I wouldn’t be mad... Yehuda's question is legitimate. Please don't bring up the Bar Mitzvah boy who's still leading in Anim Zemirot. Will we ever get another child to learn the prayer?...

(Bereishit 45:1) ‘Yosef couldn’t hold himself back.’ And so he asked everybody to leave and he revealed himself to his brothers....
No. He didn’t ask them to leave because he wanted to beat up on Dan with nobody watching. He didn’t want a fight. This isn’t a board meeting. He wanted to let his brothers know it was him... When Michael Menachem says, ‘Hold me back,’ it’s pathetic. Who are you going to hurt with your two column Hagba?!...
Yosef couldn’t hold himself back from crying. He had a heart. He wasn't on the shul board.

It was because Yehuda showed he cared. (Bereishit 44:34) ‘For how can I go up to my father and the youth is not with me, lest I see the evil that I have brought upon my father.’ Do any of you care? The evil that you have brought upon me...

And he cried. (Bereishit 45:2) Everybody heard his cry.
It was loud. You can’t hide real emotion. I know Sarah Rachel hasn't emoted since she married Baruch Moshe... It was more like a Faiga Bayla cry. When she's trying to get her parent's attention, everybody hears that.

(45:3) They were ‘disconcerted.’ Rashi teaches the brothers were embarrassed. You would be embarrassed... Yes. He told them to not feel bad for selling to slavery to die. And you guys can’t get over a sermon I gave about a cat that needed healing... A sick cat that I cared for. So, my Drasha about the cat wasn't long enough. And you're still disconcerted that I didn't show enough empathy. I sent the cat to the vet... You did nothing. You sat in the shul and said, 'The rabbi should've done more in his sermon.' I took the cat to the vet. Is that not enough? Is a sermon more important than the action...
You haven’t said a thing about Israel since you got your raise. You forgot about our brothers and sisters. I give sermons about Israel and crying for our brothers and sisters. Are you disconcerted for our people?!...

Like Yosef, I cry a loud cry when I have to answer your questions. The secretaries hear it. The pain I suffer...
Another annoying question. You fast on fast days. That’s why they’re called a fast days. You fast on a it.. No. I don’t know what happened on Asarah BTevet. It’s a fast. So you fast...
You remember stuff on fast days. You remember our people. The destruction of the Beit Hamikdash... Do you even remember what happened on Simchat Torah...
If it doesn't have to do with football, you don't remember it. Ever since you got your raise and got season tickets...

Did Yehuda truly care? He didn’t want to see the evil he caused. He cared about himself... Maybe there wouldn’t be an Asarah BTevet if we cared about each other. Maybe advocated every once in a while. If you would care for each other the way I cared about the cat.
Maybe if people paid for Bat Mitzvahs so others could enjoy themselves...

Can we have the Bat Mitzvah up here... Why are the kids in shul again? Do we not pay a youth leader to not have to see them?! Got to keep them out till after Adon Olam... No. They should not be Davening. Kids come to shul so we don’t have to see them.
And now we see Daniella. We are proud of you. Your parents may not be. All they bought for Kiddish is Kichel. Though your parents don’t care about you, I do. Someday, approach your parents and ask them to pay for a Kiddish. It starts now. In the end, they won’t chip in for your wedding... Trust me. They wouldn’t even chip in for a pasta salad last shul picnic...

Rivka's Rundown
The congregation has truly forgot about everything going on Israel. They’re more worried about football. The Monarchs are what they're concerened about. The football match of the Monarchs vs the Rochester Raging Rhinos. Professional non-American football is big in Topeka.
Point: Everybody forgot what happened on Simchat Torah already. They're too involved in the Monarchs.

'Is a sermon more important than the action?' Yes it is, rabbi.

The course on Israeli Advocacy was not attended by any of our congregants. The rabbi said that was better for Israel.

The Bat Mitzvah was enjoyed by the parents. That’s it. It was the worst Bat Mitzvah Kiddish. It was just Kichel. I was sitting there watching a bunch of old Jews teething.
She got no gifts. In retrospect, that made most of the congregation happy. I was happy I didn't have to get her anything. The only one that seemed not happy was Daniella. And she even gave a Bat Mitzvah speech about being the only kid on her block to not have a bike growing up.

The kids in our shul are pathetic. We have Bar Mitzvah boy leading Anim Zemirot. He's fourteen. You don't lead Anim Zemirot when you're over Bar Mitzvah. It's supposed to be a child. It makes the prayer more meaningful when a five year old who doesn't understand it does, than when a fourteen year old who doesn't understand it leads.
Are they legitimate kids? We don’t even know. They're crazy. I can tell you that. Seeing them in shul causes panic. We all know they can’t lead Anim Zemirot. It’s been the same kid for eight years. When the illegitimate Bar Mitzvah is not there, the Chazin leads. That’s an extra twenty minutes.

The kids are crazy. They scare the adults. This is why they don't learn how to lead Anim Zemirot. Their parents are scared of them. They know that if they teach them something, the kids will get child services over to the house.
Kids came in too early. They came in before Anim Zemirot. People were shocked. Panic set in. It was as if they were worried about nursery school hoodlums taking over the shul with their lollypops. Shaking down the rabbi for more Fizzers and sour sticks.

The fact they had to announce you fast on a fast day which took place on Friday. That is messed up.
Mid-Drasha, the rabbi got questions about how not to eat. The rabbi spent twenty minutes during his Drasha explaining what a fast day is. The congregants were shocked. 'How to fast without bagels???!' The rabbi explained how you eat the bagels after the fast.