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The Shabbat youth group weekend is happening again next week. Last time was a great success. Five teenagers showed and there were no issues in the shul. We are hoping for fewer teens this time.
Shabbis groups for the kids are now starting at 9am, when we start shul. The idea is to not have to see the kids in shul.
Please support the day school in their fundraiser. The kid needs it. We have seen what a lack of Jewish education has done to Michael.
Class on how gambling is idol worship will take place next Tuesday.
The rabbi doesn't support gambling. Yet, he's made it clear that it would be impossible for membership to give less money than they give right now. So, he is not worried about anybody losing money. A class on how to gamble right will follow, so that some of you might pay dues.
The bakery is back up and men in the back left section have put on weight.
Rabbi Mendelchem’s Sermon Excerpts
Shabbat Shalom My Pupils...
Support kids month… Sending them to the Jewish day school and paying tuition is not enough. I would like to get a new stereo system for my car…
(Shemot 10:1) 'H' tells Moshe, 'Go to Paroh for I have hardened his heart and the heart of his servants.' Why H' hardened the heart of board, I don't know. They're a Paroh to the shul. Like locusts in the chapel...
I've tried leaving, but they tell me I will not get paid... It's with these signs, the plagues, that the people can leave. But Paroh doesn't let everybody leave... The plague of the president and the sisterhood. They are always around. Covering the shul...
(10:8) Paroh asks who is going to go with them to serve H.' Paroh doesn't understand that you can never get away from the family. They follow you everywhere. Even worse, the congregants. They follow you everywhere... Paroh is thinking a holiday is celebrated away from the family. That's when you can have a good time. He doesn't understand Jewish life.
(10:9) Moshe tells Paroh that everybody is going for it is a Chag. We are all part of this congregation when it comes to celebrating... We have not had a Bar Mitzvah in while... Nobody wants to sponsor a Kiddish.. Not just the annoying people who have a hardened heart… A cheap heart. This congregation has a cheap, won't spend fifteen dollars on a babka heart... The bakery is open. Support them. We've had enough packaged babka. It's time to get the fresh babka back... Even if it costs an extra thirteen dollars...
It wasn't a shul picnic. The holidays is when everybody joins. We should leave the family out of the shul BBQs... When everybody goes on that it is very annoying. You can't even get a burger... The shul ski trip is even worse. We lost eight kids on that. You don't take kids with you to lose them...
The whole congregation includes the youth. But they go to groups. They went out with us too... They definitely had youth groups. You don't want them around... You can't leave them.
Teenagers don't come to shul. They sleep... I don't know if they left Egypt with everybody. I think they tried leaving them behind... They would've been complaining the whole trip... 'It says 'children and elders... women...' It leaves out teenagers.
Have you ever tried having a peaceful holiday with teenagers??? There is a reason for youth groups.
The best youth weekend we had was when no youth came. Rachel was the happiest I have ever seen as the head of the sisterhood...
Shabbis groups for the kids is different... The idea is to take the little ones to shul and to keep them away from the congregation. Drop them off away from the shul, in a room on the other side... They come because it is dangerous to leave them at home alone...
The pasuk continues, (Shemot 10:1) H' hardens their hearts so His signs can be seen in their midst... I just hope you can see H's signs in this congregation. Signs of what not to do. How not to treat a rabbi.
There is no Kiddish... H' with the board
Being scared is worshiping idols. Seeing H' and His signs are worshiping H'... ‘Do you worship idols? Then come tonight’… I did not come up with that ad.
We can celebrate with a good Kiddish finally. The bakery is good for Pareve cakes… No butter. It’s not easy... Yet. You choose to not see H's signs and you harden your own heart. You worship your being bad congregants...
You and your hardened hearts. And I still get across the message that you do everything wrong. Manifesting H' even with your teenagers and disappointing Enetenmann's Kiddishes, worshiping packaged cakes...
Why did H' have Moshe and Aharon speak to Paroh when his heart was hardened? It would've been easier to talk to Paroh when he was willing to listen. Catch Paroh at a time where he wasn't contrary. But that is how H' is manifest. When we push through hardness... This is why I give sermons to you. I have not met a not hardened heart in this shul. A congregation of hardened hearts.
I know H' is in our midst when I see all the angry faces in the women's section...
If there were decent baked goods for Kiddish, you wouldn't be so angry. You would have softer hearts. Hearts like a good sponge cake...
The rabbi said that if H' gave Paroh the plague of the board and the sisterhood he would've let the Jews go right away.
Nobody wants teens in shul.
Some of the little kids still come into the shul. They cling to their parents. The only way to get them out of the shul is to give them more candy. They don't have enough candy at Shabbis groups.
The youth director is about to quit. She can't stand that the parents throw all their issues on her. She calls the kids 'issues.'
If you have candy, these kids will do whatever you want. They’ll jump. They’ll even sit. Lollypops are like kiddie biscuits.She doesn't get it. If she gave the kids more sweets they would relax. The more sugar you give kids the less they run around, and the more they listen.
The shul is too focused on kids now. It was decided to make July kids month, so that the parents can be encouraged to send them to camp and we don't have to see them.
The fight for kids month went on for a while, as many contended 'their plight must be heard.' Most parents didn't agree with that, as they wanted to get sleep. Some people wanted to cancel kids month altogether, but we couldn't do that. Even if the kids are racist, we can't cancel them.
I am just sick of giving money to the kids. What is their plight anyways? More recess. I think we have to take the message from the Parsha and ask why the little kids are here when it's not a holiday?
A bunch of idol worshipers came to shul because of the email ad. The ad, ‘Do you worship idols? Then come tonight,’ did draw people's attention. Yet, it did not have the right message for the non-heathens.
The rabbi didn’t say anything about better parenting. He has given up on that. He realizes he’ll get money from the parents before expecting them to be decent people.
I get my pastry at the supermarket. It’s a twelfth of the price. I don’t need fresh cake when I am saving up for a decent vacation.
And the supermarket babka is much better a week later. It's the kind of freshness that doesn’t go away for a few months. That’s good fresh. The kind of coagulated sugar freshness. I love those cakes. The problem is they're serving the Entenmann's cakes too soon. They need to serve them closer to the expiration date.
The Melaveh Malka should’ve had bakery babka though. That would've been nice last week. The bakery babka is more Jewish and a Melaveh Malka is Jewish. That's what the rabbi said.
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They wanted to clean the silver on the Torah. Instead, they Polished it.
You get it? People from Poland are Polish. They should‘ve polished the silver. Nobody knows what it means. Maybe put a Polish person on it. If you're Polish, we do not mean to offend you. At the Kibbitzer, we are sure that many Polish know how to polish very well.
The Jerusalem Shofar carrying bag and water bottle. Perfect for when you need to blow the Shofar on a Tiyul. (saying something about a Shofar on a hike was where our creativity on this joke came to a halt)