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•Tel Aviv drops from first to third on most expensive city to live in. One more thing Israel is losing at. In order to aid in Tel Aviv reclaiming their spot as the most expensive city to live in, the city is making it impossible to park in without getting a ticket. And shawarma is up to 83nis a pita. Our Israel consultant, Tzachi, is now visiting the US to get a shawarma and falafel meal he can afford.
•Bollywood will be coming to Israel to shoot the film Heroes of Haifa, focusing on a WWI battle against the Ottoman army, won by India with a dance troupe.
ART & ENTERTAINMENT
•A Jewish adaptation of A Christmas Carol is now to hit the stage, as the Hallmark network has not worked in enough Chanukah themed Christmas parties. 'A Hanukkah Carol, or GELT TRIP! The Musical' (JTA). Rachel (our senior writer) is very excited, as this should make it easier to help our kids integrate into Christian society. To quote Mark, 'There is not enough Christmas stuff out there. We need Chanukah to be more like Christmas. I hope this helps.' The creators hope that Christmas brings them a lot of money this Chanukah.
•The Gett, a new play about Jewish divorce is out in the theaters. The director is hoping it can influence a higher level of divorce.
Rabbi Matt Green, who is behind the production, has been trying to grow programming for 'cultural Jews' (JTA). As divorce is the number one practiced and beloved mitzvah in the Jewish community, Rabbi Matt feels it is important that all Jews first connect to Yiddishkeit through a Gett.
•The new show on Netflix Mo claims Israelis kicked their family out of their home in Israel, though their family doesn't recognize that Israelis exist.
•Fordham University has decades worth of Jewish artifacts from the Bronx. 'A Catholic university may be the unlikeliest place for what may be the largest depository dedicated to the Jewish history of the Bronx' (NY Jewish Week). We did not know the Vatican had access to the Bronx when the Second Temple was destroyed.
•Channukah themed pop-up bar is making its way to NY, from Boston, with drinks like the Latke Sour (JTA). How you fry a drink is still a question our staff has. We will have to go to check out how you serve a drink in a dreidel without spilling it. Mark has made it very clear that he can't wait to taste the Flamining Chanukiah and the Maccabee on the Beach.
•The price of oil in tiny cup holders has gone up eight-hundred percent to $145 a pack of forty-four. Market speculators are saying the price is expected to go down to $9.99 on December twenty-seventh. They are still trying to figure out the reason for the price hike.
•Caroline Glick reports 'Arab Israelis are building an army.' Effie Eitam says, 'This is my old soldier ear which can hear... it is not just shooting at weddings' (JNS). It goes beyond the Arab Israeli tradition of shooting your new mother-in-law. Though many people are still trying to find ways to shoot their in-laws, many Israelis feel it is wrong to bring M16s to weddings. The Arab Israelis call this racism.
•Iranian cyberattacks on Israel are up 70% (JNS). The US is going to attack the nuclear factory creating these cyber weapons.
•Israel puts out the first frozen dessert machine to market. 'It’s Like A Nespresso Machine… But For Ice Cream!' (Janglo). Many people are made and have complained that the ice cream machine puts out the worst espresso they ever had.
And you thought Shkeidei Marak, soup-nuts, was the height of Israeli creation. No, it is not. We've moved way past Ben Gurion's rice (it's shameful Ben Gurion didn't know the difference between pasta and rice).
Now the people of the great country that brought you SodaStream are finding a way to make homemade ice cream more expensive. Like any local Israeli who has ever used a SodaStream, they will soon create a way to make the ice cream without having to purchase the capsules.
Antisemitism still exists. Kanye West is still around.
•Our weekly Kanye quote (we tried creating jokes, but nothing is as ludicrous as what he said in his interview with Alex Jones): 'Obama was not the first black president. He was another Jewish president.'
Kanye is sending a strong message to Kyrie Irving that Kyrie cannot compete with his anti-Semitic creativity. 'I'm much more anti-Semitically creative. Kyrie. Just wait till you hear what I say about Hitler and the Nazis. Catch this. "Evil should not be associated with Nazis. That's not fair to them."' Kanye then went on to blame the Jews for the price of gas, Pearl Harbor and his glasses that he lost the other morning.
•No greater place to show you hate Jews than sports.
Australian-Jewish teenager Harry Sheezel gets picked third in the Australian Football League, causing antisemitism. As Australian Football fans said, 'It's because of the Jews that a Jew was picked.'
•Israeli UFC fighter, Natan Levy, tells Kanye West (Ye) to come and see him. '...I will fight for my people in the octagon...' (JTA). We want to thank Natan for expressing the strength of our people. Natan will fight anybody who promotes antisemitism or racism in the octagon, as long as they way in at 155lbs or under.
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The Falafel of Etan
Israelis are very possessive of their falafel. Even when they have a shop, they don't like to share it… That's Etan. Standing over them while they eat. Making sure they don't run away with his falafel.