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EXT - CAR - DAY
The car is with this man for three days. He hasn't even checked it yet. He gave the car a quick glance and came back to David to explain the situation.
David sits in the Israeli mechanic's car, and the mechanic gives a soft inspirational speech to David.
The mechanic is religious, with a Yarmulke on. As is David.
Mechanic: You must to have Emunah. Faith.
David: I need my car fixed. I need somebody I have faith in to fix my car.
Mechanic: You need Emunah. Dis is de problem.
David: I have belief in God. Can you fix my car?
Mechanic: You in rush. If you have Emunah, you no rush.
David: Yes. I am in a rush. I only have two days to get the car fixed. Then I have to go to America.
Mechanic: If you Emunah. You won't no be in a rush.
David: It sounds like Emunah moves very slowly. Why does Emunah move so slow? Can you fix the car?
Mechanic: I have Emunah.
David: Your car works. We're sitting in it. It drives. If I had a car that drove, I would have Emunah. Can you fix the car?
Mechanic: You must to relax and have Emunah.
David: I don't have time to relax.
Mechanic (giving a soft look to say 'you see'): See. You no have Emunah.
David: I'm taking the car to another mechanic. One who works and doesn't have Emunah.
David is leaving the car.
David: And I know that you didn't used to wear a Kippah. You can't fool me with that. I know you're ripping people off.
This guy had Emunah. But he didn't fix my car. Why couldn't he just fix my car.
I believe, at some point, he thought my name was Emunah.
I am still trying to figure out how the mechanic turned into my rabbi. It is beautiful to have such devout mechanics in our country. The only issue is, the devout mechanics charge more.
The cab driver also gave me a spiritual speech, when I told him I'm late to the wedding. He told me you have to have Emunah, and he drove very slow. And the cab ride ended up costing a lot.
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I was going to do Kaparos before Yom Kippur, but I chickened out.
You get it? Kaparos is the tradition of placing your sins on something else, the day before Yom Kippur, traditionally a chicken, and waiving it. He chickened out of the chicken. He might've done it with money in the end. But that would still be without a chicken.
Designated stroller parking area. Something every shul needs, so I can get through the entrance on Yom Kippur... Truth is they should have stroller parking all the time. The entrance is always blocked.
Problem: Merv and Bernie will end up parking there. They already take the disabled parking spots and walk just fine. When it comes to parking, every member of our congregation is disabled.
Side Note: Figured out why so many kids come to shul on Yom Kippur. Because they get to eat in shul on Yom Kippur.