Only thing worse than having to see your friends in theater is having to see your friends' kids on the stage. (www2.schechter.org)
Scene 1
INT - PLAYHOUSE LOBBY - NIGHT The community is standing in front of the theater, talking. Nancy and Mark are a couple in their thirties. Nancy is trying to hide from all the people they know from shul. Random Woman: Shalom guys. Nancy turns to Mark. Nancy: Is this a community event or a play? Mark: I feel like I'm at shul right now. Nancy: You should've just went to Minyin. Now you're going to have to do Mariv (the evening prayer service) here. Mark: Shoot. There's the rabbi. Let's get our seats. Scene 2 INT - PLAYHOUSE THEATER - NIGHT Sitting before the play, Beauty and the Beast, the couple sees a friend in the playbill. The friend is a random girl. Nancy: What are we doing here? Mark: Supporting our friends. Nancy: Is this going to be good? Mark: Our friends are in it. Nancy: Then why are we here? Mark: Our friends are in it. It's a play that our friends are in. They invited us. Nancy: We didn't show up to their house for dinner last Friday night. They invited us to that. Last time we were at one of these, we saw Rachel playing Tevye in Fiddler on the Roof. Mark: That's what makes community theater great. Nancy: The fiddler. Tevye. He is a man. Mark: It's creativity. She was a good fiddler. We would have never seen a woman playing Tevye... Nancy: She doesn't even play violin. Mark: Creativity. Nancy: We saw Beauty and the Beast on Broadway. Amazing costumes. Actors sing beautifully. They're holding masks on their face. Mark: But they're not your friends. Nancy: But they're talented. In the middle of the play, Random Woman is waving to Nancy. Nancy waves back, and shows a little post-hello frustration. Mark shows Nancy the playbill. Mark: Look at this. Rachel is in it. Nancy: I think the pot is a woman. I hope Mrs. Potts is a woman. Mark: It would be so much better if Baruch played Mrs. Potts. It's the creativity. Nancy: If they really are our friends, they wouldn't have charged us to come to something they invited us to. Mark: Look. The Candle has a Kippah. Nancy: That's what excites you? Mark: Yes. That's a Jewish production. Creativity. Nancy: The rabbi should be in it. Mark: Exactly. Nancy leaves in frustration. An hour and a half later, sitting at the community event. Nobody is enjoying the play, but they are all showing their support. The big scene of reveal of the Beast comes, and the Beast's mask comes off. Everybody is amazed and excited. Mark: That's Baruch. I know Baruch. Nancy: Baruch is the Beast? Random Guy: I know Baruch too. Nancy: Hey Baruch. Baruch has his time as a star, for the local members of the shul. He's the talk at Kiddish that week. Scene 3 INT - PLAYHOUSE LOBBY - NIGHT Huge group of people talking in the hallway. Random Guy 2 (announces): Minyin. We need two more for Maariv. Mark (to Nancy): It was worth it. At least I caught Minyin. Mark goes to join Minyin. NonJewish Friend from Work goes to Nancy. NonJewish Friend: Why are they praying in the corner? It's a Jewish event. Nancy: There might not be anti-Semites here. But it's hard to like these people. Kibbitzer Conclusion Nobody was bothered by Mark and Nancy talking. Their conversation seemed to be more exciting than seeing Rachel play a candle. You go to the community play to show support for your friends. You don't go to enjoy yourself. You go to see your friends in the play and to talk to all the people you saw at Kiddish last Shabbat. The great thing is that they have the artistic license in community theater. Beauty and the Beast on Broadway is a great play, with amazing actors. A spectacle. You see it in community theater and the most exciting thing is seeing your friend. If you're lucky, the evening becomes more exciting when you go out with the cast for ice cream. Your friends that invited you to the play make you pay for the ice cream too. Mrs. Potts was played by Shlomo. That was Mark's favorite part of the play, and when Nancy took a twenty minute break, in frustration. Nancy was also very mad having to see this poor effort after seeing Beauty and the Beast on Broadway. To now have to see the woman who sits next to her in shul holding her mask, on stage, in her hand the whole play. Tags:
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Why do you trust somebody who says they smell a fire? She nose. You get it? She knows because she smelled the fire. We smell with our nose. She nose! “She knows what she nose.” Some puns you have to read. 
I always wondered why Costco had those chairs out… I could not fit him in the cart.
I do hope I didn’t wake him with my shopping. It’s a Chutzpah that they leave on the lights like that. 
David Kilimnick - Israel's "Father of Anglo Comedy" (JPost) is not touring with his Israel solidarity show. Bring David to your community, college campus, shul, home, to share laughs of Jewish unity... 585-738-9233 [email protected]
(Shemot 21:15, 17) Cursing one’s parents is punishable by death. So don’t drive behind your mom or dad when they get older. Old people drive slow. You’re allowed to beep your parents, as long as there is no curse behind the beep. And don’t work for your dad. It’s natural to curse anybody that makes you work. And don't help with chores around the house. That leads to cursing.
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The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
2/23/2022
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