They're planning a party for the Kohens. They're calling it the Big Day Kahuna.
You get it? The Torah talks about the Kohens and their clothes. Bigdei means clothes. Kahuna means of Kohens. Big Kahuna, an American idiom. You should have vast knowledge to get into pun creation. Everybody gave half a shekel when they counted Jews. It spoke to their census. (Rabbi Mendel) You get it? A census is counting. They did that in the desert. To avoid a plague, and death, heads weren't counted, but the half shekels. Makes sense. Senses. Their senses. Their census. Why was the activity not exciting last Shabbat? They were board games. (Rabbi Mendel) You get it? Board. Bored. Not fun. Board games are a great Shabbat activity. Make them fun. Puns are better said. Not written. Look away and say 'board games'… Now, it’s funny. He wouldn't need to be good at singing or music if he had a talent. (Rabbi Mendel) You get it? A talent is something you're good at. A talent is a weight of money, which was a lot of silver in the times of the Torah. With all that silver he would be rich enough to not need to be talented. Puns are about education. I asked a hippie, dressed as a villain, 'Who are you dressed as?' He said, 'HeyMan.' (Rabbi Mendel) You get it? A lot of people pronounce Haman as Haymen. That's close enough to Hey Man. And that's how hippies talk. It's not just a costume, it's a way of life, a mindset. Artistic expression is very important when sharing puns. What's it called when they pour seltzer on the Altar? A Karbon Dioxide... Then they recite Mizmor LSoda. You get it? The offerings in the Temple were called a Karbon. Carbon Dioxide is the fizz in the soda... Soda. Mizmor LSoda is one of the types of songs in Tehillim. Brilliant. A double pun. And bilingual necessity. Doesn't get better than this. Tags:
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How do we know Rachel paid her maidservant? She’d Bilhah. You get it? Bilhah. Bill her. Rachel’s maid was Bilhah. Zilpah didn’t charge Leah. How do we know that? Because she didn’t Bilhah. Thank you. See how I brought that pun back around for you. 
My kitchen. I keep them. Never use them. But I keep them. Must have at least three hundred paper bags. One for each time I go shopping without a plastic bag. And that’s how I help the world, saving the environment. Tikun Olam. The question
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(Pirkei Avot 5:10) “One who says ‘what’s mine is mine and yours is yours’ is a regular person.” That sounds right. Regular people say stupid stuff. And we’re not talking about somebody who doesn’t share their Milk of Magnesia.
“And some say it’s the Sodom character trait.” Your not sharing Sunkist fruit gems destroys. Like Sodom, you’re selfish. You don’t invite people to your house. You don’t give to the poor. And you take all the choolante meat at Kiddish. Sorry. I was just at a Bar Mitzvah. It’s the “all about me” attitude. And that’s how regular people are. Regular people never share their gummies. And that’s why Sodom got destroyed. And that dad was right for armbaring the kid who didn’t share the Bar Mitzvah fruit gem bags. Lesson of Love: By sharing your Paskesz, you can save the world. Categories
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The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire written by David Kilimnick and poorly edited by David Kilimnick.
So, blame his pseudonyms.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to share ideas, make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire written by David Kilimnick and poorly edited by David Kilimnick.
So, blame his pseudonyms.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to share ideas, make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
3/23/2022
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