The Breadcrumbs widget will appear here on the published site.
How did Ha-Shem get the burning bush to ignite? It was a match made in Heaven.
You get it? The bush was from heaven. Sometimes, a pun is about the meaning it brings to your life. Why did the Jews want to leave Egypt? Because the juice was bad... Mitz Ra'im. (Rabbi Mendel) You get it? Mitz Ra'im means bad juice. Egypt is Mitzrayim. Another brilliant bilingual Biblical pun. We stayed away from the Jews juice pun, because we have high standards. What do you give a dog who's good at math? A chesh-bone. You get it? Cheshbon is an invoice in Hebrew, also used to mean math. Really smart dogs say Matimatikah. Plagues affect the animals. The Parsha last week... To understand our puns, we suggest you take up Semitic languages. Why couldn't they figure out the type of wheat it was? Because of the way it was spelt. (Rabbi Mendel) You get it? Spell a word. Spelt is a type of wheat. Tu BShvat is about the seven species of Israel. One is wheat. Educational too. The guide dogs that wandered with the Jews were called Seen-eye Dogs. (Rabbi Mendel) You get it? Mount Sinai. Seeing eye sounds like Sinai, if you pronounce 'Sinai' in proper Hebrew. And, maybe Ten Commandment dogs did help blind people. A spiritual pun, and phonetically sound too. Note: You have to say 'seeing eye' very fast, and without the 'g,' for it to sound like Sinai. Unlike a Canaanite slave, if you knock out a Jewish slave's teeth, he doesn't go free. He's only an in'denture'd servant. You get it? The Jewish slave's teeth aren't real. Dentures. They celebrated a lot in the Mikdash (the Temple). That's why they used acacia wood. It's good for all acacians. (Rabbi Mendel) You get it? Acacia, Occasions. We did our part. That's close enough. The Blog Tags Widget will appear here on the published site.
Tags:
The Recommended Content Widget will appear here on the published site.
Leave a Reply. |
A well put together cover page for a Jewish newspaper. I knew I was reading a Frum Jewish newspaper, as they found a way to fit 28 ads on the cover page. And the feature article is an ad for Amor jewelry... A properly written Jewish magazine should be advertisements. I once read a non-religious magazine, and I felt like a sinner when I read an article to only find there was no phone number at the end of it. I felt defiled… It’s a shame the Amor ad is so big. They could’ve got another 20 ads in.
(Shulchan Aurch 568:1) One who eats by accident on a fast must continue fasting. Making for a three hour fast to fully mourn the Churban of the Temples. I believe that break between meals fully calls to heart the true yearning of my soul over the loss of the Batei Mikdash... You can't eat once you remember you sinned, as one who committed a sin can't commit a second by snacking once they're already full.
Categories
All
Archives
July 2024
|
2/10/2022
0 Comments