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Amereekayis orderring falafel is funny. I tell story.
Ameicano want line He ask, 'Why you no wait line?' So cute. Amereekaiy comee and make line. I say, 'You see falafel, you go to where is.' He look for line. The line is at the ball. I get before heem. I call Israeli friendees of me. Ehhh they come too. Whole neighborhood come and he steeel wait on line. I finish, he steeel line wait. How Much Amereekaiy come and ask how much. 'How much?' Is thees steakeetyada. It no steak. It falafel. 500 shekel. What he sink? Like he ehhhh get reeped off wis all. It's falafel. You pay extra five shekel. You sound funny. You speak wis that Americano accentee. Dis no good. Come to falafel stand, like ehhhhh, 'what you have heere?' He sell falafel. It falafel stand. Like, they want salat. You want salat, I give you. I charge more. Dis vhy they ehhhh get reeped off. They ask like idiote. I no ask, I take. He say 'why dis.' I say 'yes dis.' We both say 'I do you do.' So we do. Very funny. Want deal? Falafel deal? What Amereekaiy sink? You get deal on all? Everyting ehhhh sale. He sink dis eees ehhh Marshall's. He look for clearance rack. No clearance rack at Amos Falafel. 'Falafel balls from last season. Three month old falafel, we give deal.' Always want deal. American sink two for price of one. They give two balls for one. He charge five more shekel. Price on wall. Amereekaiy no see it. He sink, zis Amereekaiy, zis falafel shuk. What he bargain? Like ehhh 'Two falafel for 20.' Zer sign here. And he walk away wis no drink. It say ploose drinkeee. He no read math? No Spicey Two hours zey wait on line. He get to order. Wait. Somebody cut heem in middle of heees question about deal. He finally order. He say, 'No Chareef.' No spicey? What you eat zen? Ehhh. Dis no gefilte feesh. So ehhh zey wait two hour for no spicey hot gefilte feesh balls. Deeees so funny. I stay. I eat two falafels. Laugh. And he pay. I tell you of knew Olim next time. Why they move America? ***From Kibbitzer Staff: Sorry about the grammar. We tried. Spellcheck didn’t work. The Blog Tags Widget will appear here on the published site.
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A well put together cover page for a Jewish newspaper. I knew I was reading a Frum Jewish newspaper, as they found a way to fit 28 ads on the cover page. And the feature article is an ad for Amor jewelry... A properly written Jewish magazine should be advertisements. I once read a non-religious magazine, and I felt like a sinner when I read an article to only find there was no phone number at the end of it. I felt defiled… It’s a shame the Amor ad is so big. They could’ve got another 20 ads in.
(Shulchan Aurch 568:1) One who eats by accident on a fast must continue fasting. Making for a three hour fast to fully mourn the Churban of the Temples. I believe that break between meals fully calls to heart the true yearning of my soul over the loss of the Batei Mikdash... You can't eat once you remember you sinned, as one who committed a sin can't commit a second by snacking once they're already full.
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4/26/2021
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