Why Do They Hate Us This Week

by David Kilimnick

People really hate Jews. They hate us everywhere. I'm not just saying that. I've been to shul. The membership there doesn't even like each other.
After watching the news this week, it seems they are coming up with more reasons to hate us. I didn't know that was possible. At this point, is it necessary? They have so many reasons already.  
They’ve kicked us out of their countries because we were successful. They kicked us out of their countries because we were poor. They massacred us in their countries. Yet, they are still coming up with more reason to kick us out of their countries.
Here are some new reasons I found out this past week to hate Jews. And some older restored reasons to hate Jews that they forgot about for a few years.

We have all the money. Somebody told me Nick Cannon said this. So, there is truth to it. Wild N' Out is not just an improv rap show. It's a place to get a sense of the economic makeup of American society. Nick Cannon was hired by Jewish people at some point, and they must have had money. It doesn't take much to deduce that Jews have all the money, if you have money they used to pay you.
Turns out Bill Gates is Jewish. He has money. I just deduced that.

We have somebody involved in politics. We run that too. I deduced that too.

They've been listening to the news. And the news says to hate Jews. And now they trust the media. The forecast guy can't get one thing right. But he knows the Jews are murderers.
And the Jews run the news. The Jews want people to hate them.

We got attacked. They hate us because they attacked us.
We defend ourselves. They hate us more.
We say it's wrong to kill the Jews. They hate us even more. And they want to kill us.

Candace Owens and Tucker Carlson said to hate us. I believe there is a shared quote, "We are mad at Ben Shapiro, so you should hate Jews." And because they are mad at Ben Shapiro, the Jews ran the slave trade. They were the sole owners of all slaves. And they drink the blood of everybody.
And Tucker Carlson has not yet met a Jihadi Jew. Which means that Jews are racist. And we are not doing our part in globalizing the Intifada.

The blood libels weren't enough. Candace is coming up with new ones. Like the Gemara runs the banks. And now she is monetizing the blood libels. I heard from a confidant that Candace Owens is producing a horror film starring Jewish vampires who are looking for the Kosher blood of Catholic babies. Mel Gibson has agreed to a cameo. I heard but I didn't really hear. But I did hear. If you know. She is also looking for Mashgichim to give their blessing to the blood, for Kosher certification.

​Jews are not good enough friends. As described by Megyn Kelly, good friends take up their friends' lies, and they don't argue with them when it comes to hating the Jews. And Tucker Carlson made it clear that Ben Shapiro is not one of those good friends. Which is why you should hate Jews.
I personally am Jewish, and I have missed some birthday parties at Chuck E. Cheese. Which is why everybody on my little league baseball team, The Carriage Cleaners, now hates Jews.

Shanon Sharpe and his buddy, Ochocinco, said that the Jews are running everything. Nightcap is the podcast people get their information on football players from the nineties, how to be unfaithful to your partner, and in-depth political analysis on how Jews run the world. Which consists of, "Jews run the world." "I know they do." "Exactly. Everything." "The information is right there. We have the receipts." I believe that's how they proved that. 
I found out the Jews are not running their show. Which is why they hate Jews. It turns out the Jews run everything in the world, but NIghtcap. Nightcap is the only thing they don't run.
Nick Cannon doesn't know the Jews run the world. He just thinks they have all the money. That's because he hasn't watched Nightcap, and doesn't know about the Beastie Boys. Who, as everybody knows, run the world of rap. I just deduced that.

We run businesses. Unfortunately, many of them are profitable.

We've acknowledged people who say they hate us. The people who hate us hate that. Using the word anti-Semite to define an anti-Semite really gets an anti-Semite mad.
You can't use the word "antisemitism" anymore, unless if it's against the Arabs. The people of Gaza have claimed that, along with "genocide." Which I now realize I have been misinterpreting. Genocide, in modern dialect, means to protect oneself. Which the Jews are guilty of perpetrating.
Jews defending themselves causes a lot of hatred. And on top of that, to claim that the Holocaust was a genocide, that is retroactive cultural misappropriation.

Kanye West doesn't hate the Jews anymore. At least as of yesterday. That's a reason to hate us. I don't think I understand one thought of his. I am questioning if I should hate myself now.
​I heard Kanye West apologized to the Jews. Biggest mistake of his career. Now he lost all his fans to Dave Chappelle. And now people hate the Jews and Kanye West.

We pulled out of Gaza. They wanted us to leave, we pulled back. Now they hate us because we listened.
Hamas kills their own civilians. They're fine with their own people dying. And that is Israel's fault. They hate us because Hamas did... I truly do not understand any of this. And I still don't get how these people have money, when we have all of it. I am not good at deducing everything.

The fact is we ruined the post October Seventh celebration they were all having. That was rude. And they hate us.

They worked so hard hating us. You put so much effort into something, you want to see the fruits of your labor.
I hope I’m not giving them more ideas.

America. We live there. They hate that.

The Intifada is being globalized. That's our fault. It would've been done already if we were Hamas.

They teach it at the universities. So, it must be true. 

​Qatar has a lot of money. So, they hate us. And Qatar is Jewish. I deduced that as well.

We killed terrorists. Israel has taken out people who are trying to kill Israelis. Dave Chappelle has a problem with that. And thus, because he only shares facts in his show, it is true, and you should hate Jews.

​​Those are the new reasons to hate Jews this week. We shall see what those wacky Jew haters come up with next week. 

Postscript
To note, there are a lot of people who love Jews, because they know we have all the money. I deduced that. You see. I'll explain. If somebody has all the money, you want to be friends with them. This way, they can share it with you. The only problem is that, because of Ben Shapiro, Jews aren't good friends.