Sermons of Rebuke V: VaYakhel-Pikudei

by Rivka Schwartz

Announcements
Flights to Israel are now through Egypt. Thank Gd our congregants are safe. Our congregants that were in Israel did come back through Egypt. That’s how much they wanted to get out of Israel.
 
Shul Tehillim circle is not happening this week. Malka can’t make it, so there is no praying.
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Mazel Tov to the Feldmans.
 
A Makom should only take up one seat. A Makom is your seat in shul. Everybody should know, Pinchas‘ Tallis doesn’t get a seat. His shawl isn’t a person. Even if it’s uncomfortable to say it to Pinchas. 
Pinchas. Please move your Tallis so people can sit.
 
Contemporary Halacha Classes: How Our People Left Israel- The Jews of Today and Other Stuff Left Out of the Bible. Why None of Our Congregants Other Than Malka Know Hebrew. How To Wish a Mazel Tov to The Feldmans on Their Mazel Tov- Events That Are Not Specified and Other Stuff Our Office Will Explain. How Many Makoms Can You Take Up- A Games Night with Our Congregants- A Form of Musical Chairs to Be Played During Minyin.

Rabbi Mendelchem's Drasha Excerpts
Shabbat Shalom My Pupils...
Wise-hearted people worked on the Tabernacle. H’ didn’t want idiots... Because when you have idiots, working on the building, you have a Mechitzah that falls. The partition falls every time we Daven. You put up an egalitarian Mechitzah... It makes no sense. Wise-hearted people measure stuff. That’s why the Tabernacle didn’t fall... They took Mishkan apart, Bernie. The Tabernacle didn't fall.
And now that the wise people did their thing we speak of “the reckonings of the Tabernacle” (Shemot 38:21)... They didn’t wreck it. They reckoned it. That’s the problem with our shul. Our board thinks they’re fulfilling Gd’s word by wrecking everything. They ruin the shul and they think they're filling the Beit HaMikdash Miat... A shul is supposed to be a small Temple. And ours is very small, because of messed up renovations, that just turned into destruction... How you call breaking a wall “renovations” is...

The materials. This is what we got from the people. They weren’t just wise. They were giving. Which is why the renovations of the Tabernacle didn’t take three years. The donations to the Mishkan were given... You people say you will give. It doesn't happen. By the Tabernacle, they donated what they said they'd donate. They weren’t trying to all work tax write-offs at the same time...
It worked because their Levites showed up for services... And they showed up on time...

Even when they traveled. Even when they were in the dangerous desert, they did things right. They reckoned in the hard times.
They were worried about hate, but the one “whose heart motivates him” donated (Shemot 35:5). They said they want to help, not like our congregants... You ran when we asked you to hold up the Mechitzah, Brian. Because Brian has no heart. That’s what made them people with hearts... I’m not sure. I’m guessing the desert was dangerous, with Amalek and the Ites.
We need people with heart who show up... People with heart donate. They give even in the hard times. They participate in building. Not ruining... What has been hard Brian?... I know it's hard to get into a new series. That's a very tough time. We all go through hard times in our lives, when we finish streaming a series and have no idea what to do...
They didn't have nice cars back then. They didn't have fancy houses in the desert... They didn't have trucks taking up the whole highway moving their homes. You think everything was so easy in the desert, because of the Manna. I get it Cheryl. It wasn't as easy as you have it. You have Manna every day. A whole supermarket full of it...
It's about heart. This Drasha is about heart... Not about going to the supermarket and picking up food you find disgusting and donating it to poor people. That is just rude...

You need heart. Flights to Israel are messed up. I get it. But it's our homeland. It's where we pray to be... You're all praying to get out of there. "Oh. H'. Please help me get out of Jerusalem." That's your prayer... Why? Because you have no heart.
So the idea is to travel out of Israel, through places that hate Jews, to avoid places that hate Jews... Egypt. Germany is now the safest place to travel through... Turkey. Felvel came back through Turkey, who promises to destroy Israel.
You couldn’t spend more time in Israel. How you wanted to get out of there. You were willing to risk your life...
But you Daven in Egypt. You show up on time to services when there is nobody to pray with... I get it. Leaving Egypt. That is when we erected the Mishkan. Is that what you're all doing running out of Israel? Trying to rebuild the Tabernacle?!

You need heart to do stuff right.
Egypt is separating men and women in the airports. Which the Feinwitz family appreciated. Mr. Feinwitz hates his wife.... We only separate for prayer and celebrations. We travel together in this shul... OK. Unless if it’s on a bus.

And now there’s no Tehillim. Our people need Tehillim now. They’re getting bombed. But they don't get the prayers of Psalms because Malka is the only one in this shul with a heart... Malka has a wise heart. Wise-hearted Malkie.
And that is why Malka is in Israel right now. Stuck there. Because she has a heart... People booking bad tickets, and forgetting to catch their flight, takes heart... I don't know if Malka would have helped build the Tabernacle. I can say, she would've donated something. I know she dropped off the expired box of Cheerios for the poor people... At least it was a name brand, Mark. You're bringing Good Value ‘O’s... Is that even a brand? It's a sale sign. You donated Walmart Sale Sign ‘O’s. The poor people do not appreciate your heart.

What are the Feldmans celebrating?  We just got a Mazel Tov in the announcements. Nothing else... Well. Mazel Tov on your Mazel Tov. You should be blessed with good heart and reckonings. And a board that is not involved in your home's renovations. They will wreck it.

Pinchas. Heart is not about taking up the whole things. Moshe didn't help with the reckonings, and the reckon the whole place for himself...
You take up whole row with his Tefillin, coat, bags. His Tallis has a spot. A spot for a Tallis. We’re going to charge your Tallis on the High Holidays.
People sitting next to you might happen in shul. That's what happens when you pray with people... There are other people here... Your Shtender has a chair. It’s a free-standing lectern with its own chair. You have a conductor table in shul with its own seat.... And you were all against pews. At least you could justify a pew being yours... It's five seats. But one. 
I'm just asking you all to have heart. To share. To give. To not mess up the building of our shul like the dumb-hearted.

When you have a heart, nothing stops you from being good. Man's Search for Meaning. Read it... I know it's not in Hebrew. Yet, it's a great Sefer. It's Torah… It’s not because you haven’t read the book. You have no heart because you’re an idiot.
When you have a good heart, you don't take up every seat... It is wise-hearted to keep Bernie away. I get it. In that case, taking up space...
When you keep that heart you travel as a Jew and risk your life. You travel to Israel. You say Tehillim, even without Malka. You move. When you have a good heart, you're in good shape. Your cardiovascular system...
No heart. Just selfishness. This is why we lost the shul basketball league this year. No heart.

You win with heart. Renovations are done right with heart. You reckon with heart. And with heart, we wish the Feldmans a Mazel Tov... People didn't donate Mazel Tovs to the Tabernacle...

Rivka's Rundown
The rabbi ended the Drasha on a whole fitness thing, talking about having a good heart. And somehow aerobics leads to donations.
​And even after the sermon, people still haven't paid their Yom Kippur Yizkur Appeals.  But they did donate a bunch of Chametz to the poor people, dropping the expired cans off at the shul, reckoning the shul very not Kosher for Pesach. 
I have a feeling people clean their homes, drop off their Chametz at the shul, and claim it's for poor people. Basically, their donations are their issues they're throwing at the shul. They trauma dump their garbage on the shul.

Very few people were in shul. They saw it was a double Parsha. That scared them away. To quote Evie, “The Levites didn’t show up when there was a double Parsha.”

That supermarket full of Manna line. Brilliant. That's Jewish theology in four words.
Why the rabbi always talks about fancy cars in the times of the Torah. No idea. We know Lincoln Town Cars didn't exist back then.
I think the rabbi's main point was they didn't have a Kosher section in the desert. And they still donated to their shul. Which was the Mishkan. And they showed up to services.

The rabbi ended his sermon with a shul chant. “We are Beis Knesses Anshei Emes uSefilah and we have heart. When the game is on, we always start.” Made no sense and it had no beat.
The name of our shul is too long to root for. That's why we always lose.

I guess the Ites are a people. The rabbi said so.

The rabbi had to take back the risking your life part with the whole leaving Israel thing. It scared people. In a class during the week, he was asked when it's fine to risk your life. He made it clear that the only time it's fine to risk your life is when Kashering your kitchen for Pesach. At that point, throwing boiling water and taking a blowtorch to your home is fine.

All of these flights are crazy now. Got to fly through the most dangerous places. Truth be told, Iran is the safest place to fly through. Nobody is aiming for those airports.
The IRGC of Iran really kills flights and vacations. They will ruin a good trip.
Our Jewish people over here will do anything to not be in Israel. Our congregants will show their solidarity in every way but being there. They will go on a walk for Israel. They will shop for Israel. They dedicate their vacations to Florida to Israel. At the Kiddish luncheon, Michel dedicated his gefilte fish to Israel, and ate it.

Malka is not back from Israel because she missed her flight. She wanted out of Israel too. She's just as much of a heretic as every one of us. But she does lead a good Tehillim prayer service. Very melodic.

Tehillim circle is messed up. They just come to talk. Most of them are knitting scarves. It’s more of a sewing circle. A sewing and talking about people circle. It’s a Tehillim Lashon Hara circle. Being that we have some Israelis who show up, and they're talking in Hebrew, it sounds very religious.

The donations are messed up. I'll just leave it as that. Our shul is the expired food bank.

At least the shul announced some stuff that was happening this week. Like a Mazel Tov to the Feldmans. A Mazel Tov sounds like enough of an event. A Mazel Tov is something to celebrate. I love hearing "Mazel Tov." If you see me, wish me a Mazel Tov. Mazel Tovs are always good. If my husband dies, I'll be fine hearing Mazel Tov.

Taking up five Makoms. Not a lie. These people take up five seats. His tallis has a spot. The guest stood for forty-five minutes, trying to figure out if it was proper to ask the Tallis to move.
They all take up four to six spots. Whole rows. They take up whole rows. I think they pay dues and they feel they have the right to a row. Our shul holds a hundred eighty people or five of our members at morning Minyin.
B”H there are no pews. I'm against the rabbi and his pews idea. If there were pews, Pinchas would take up the whole shul. He would have at least five pews. A pew for his Tefillin. His Tefillin would have a pew. He would lay out his jacket. I was once in a waiting room with Pinchas. No other family in the ICU got a couch. He claimed them all. One of them was Pinchas' coat. One couch was the food he picked up at Costco. He said he needed a couch for it because the boxes of chips were too big.

Because they called for the musical chairs Makom game to be played during Minyin, nobody showed up to the event. It turns out that prayers chase people away from our shul.