Many people know Sukkah songs. However, poetry adds depth. Poems make the holiday more meaningful. Here are a few poems I wrote in third grade, to bring spirituality to your Sukkot holiday.
Sukkah Hopping Sukkah hopping is hopping from Sukkah to Sukkah I hope we don't have to hop Thank Gd. If we did. I would stop And go back home I don't think I can hop a mile even when I'm not alone That's it?! All this Sukkah has is soup?! Now I know why we have to go to another Sukkah More candy?! From Sandy?! Is this Sukkot or Halloween Instead of a house, we're hopping from Sukkah to Sukkah Hoping for some ice cream We wouldn't have had to hop if just one Sukkah served a meal I don't want an orange peel People throw out the peel Or compost it Even with chocolate on it You will notice that I chose poetry over the report. The teacher said that for my report to do well I needed punctuation. You will also notice that we were hoping, not hopping, for ice cream. A little play on words, which I tried saying. It didn't work as well in oral form. When I recited this composition in third grade gym class, my fellow students asked what "hope" has to do with "hopping." I had to explain that it was a work of literature. Why Are We Sitting Out Here (I wrote this one in third grade about Sukkot - I was inspired) It's freezing- why are we outside I understand there is a cover you call Schach- but the cover has holes in it The chair is made of metal- where should I sit It's freezing- I said the chair is made of metal That's your forearm- who measures with a cubit If this is our home- I want out of this family For seven days I can do it- as long as we have brisket and hot pastrami It's still freezing and brisket tastes good inside too I truly love hot pastrami. I would've sat outside on the frozen chairs, in the uneven cubit Sukkah, for the hot pastrami. I got a bad grade on this poem. My Torah and Mishna teacher was not inspired by my words. I Love You Holiday Oh Shabbat How I love you Pesach, Sukkot You are the joy of every Jew Shavuot, Yom Kippur I love you too I love every day When we don’t have school Mrs. Funsten gave me a bad grade on that, even though ‘school’ loosely rhymes with ‘Jew.’ Wrong of her, as I had a diction problem and never was able to pronounce the ‘l.’ Schoo and Jew rhyme. I believe that is quite clear. Tags:
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What do say when eating a leafy vegetable that’s been peppered with a little salt and a dash of citrus? Kale Melach Leemon. You get it? Instead of Kel Melech Ne’eman, which is said before Shema- when said alone. Kel is Gd’s name but not. It’s Gd’s name pronounced un-in-vain. In this prayer, you spell Gd’s substituted name more phonetically correct to suit the vegetable. Melach is salt. And Leemon is lemon, for those learning the correct Hebrew word. Or maybe just say the Ha’adama blessing, as it’s from the ground. A lot of thought went into this pun. And heresy. 
I felt bad executing the bagel. But I did what I had to. There was lox.
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Yad Soledet Bo, temperature at which a hand gets burnt, and retracts, is 113 to 160°F. How do we know this? The rabbis got people to test it. They would have people risk their hands. When the person screamed, they were like, "That's the temperature." Some people didn't scream right away. They tried toughing it out. And when they passed out, the rabbi was like, "That's the temperature..." And the students of the rabbi were in shock, "I can't believe he made it to 160°F." And thanks to Reb Shloimy, who is no longer with us, we were able to figure out the highest degrees of what would be considered cooking on Shabbat. If he didn't risk his life, we wouldn't have known.
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The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire written by David Kilimnick and poorly edited by David Kilimnick.
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A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
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The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire written by David Kilimnick and poorly edited by David Kilimnick.
So, blame his pseudonyms.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to share ideas, make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
10/3/2025
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