Since the beginning of the war, and the recent tragedies that befell our people, American Jews have made it a point to do stuff for Israel. Some have sent packages. Some have went shopping. Some have went out for dinner. Some have even vacationed in Panama, for Israel.
I feel it's time for me to do my part. And that is why I wrote this love sonnet of support for Israel. An imprecise sonnet in song. And now, THE SONG FOR ISRAEL: I dedicate this song for you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. I went to the mall for you. Picked up some shoes for you. They were UGGs. Cause I support you. Israel I support you. Then I got a Sundae at Friendly’s, because it was Sunday for Israel. Then I renovated my house for you, Israel. Put in air-conditioning for you. Because it was hot in Rochester. And it’s hot in Israel. I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Went on a walk for you. Went to the park for you. Had a picnic with a checkered blanket for you. Israel I support you. We ate pasta for you. It was a sunny day for you. Played pickup basketball for you, Israel. Called a foul for Israel when I got hit on the layup. Then I played pickleball for you. Israel. It’s like Matkot with a net and a different ball. I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Had a BBQ for you. With my family. In solidarity. For you. In New Jersey. For you. Israel I support you. We had a Bar Mitzvah in our shul for you. Packed up fruit for you in the grocery. We loaded up our fridge for you, Israel. I gave money to my shul for you. In Rochester. A huge Kiddish in honor of you. Then I went out and got drunk for you. I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Went for lunch. Dedicated my hamburger to you. The crunchy fries for you. A blooming onion for you. Israel I support you. Blooming like you. Israel. The Golan. Dunked it in mayonnaise. It was blooming. And the fries were crunchy. For you, Israel. The crunchy blooming country. Israel. Was going to do the army. But I bought a necklace for you. With a heart and a picture of my girlfriend in it. It was a locket necklace of a heart for you and my girlfriend. For you, Israel. I was going to get the dog tag for you. I got a dog instead. For you. I bought a Maltese for you. Israel. To protect you. I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. I was going to join Tzahal. I volunteered at the kennel for you. I wore a flag for you. Wore the blue and white, and red for you. Israel I support you. And I went on that trip for you. To Spain. Had a layover in Maine. There was rain. I was in a plane. For you, Israel. The rain is Spain stays mainly in the plain. For you. Israel. Cause I support you. And then I moved to New York for you. Bought a house in the Five Towns for you. Israel. Israel. I held off on that move for you. Was going to visit you. But for you, I saved money. And I went to Miami. In solidarity, with you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. I didn't make a donation for you. Israel. Because our love is deeper than that. Our love is deeper than money. Because I love you. I support you. Israel. Put up a post for you on social MeeDayYah. That’s Hebrew. For you. And I went to the gym today. In dedication for you. Israel I support you. And I sent the hand-me-downs to you. I won’t forget that. I support you. ***Please note: "Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you. Israel I support you." That is the chorus of the sonnet. If I understand sonnets correctly. It’s probably a song. I now feel like I've done my part in support of Israel. And every Israeli that eats blooming onions knows it. Tags:
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Israelis excel at jujitsu because they followed the Sensei who said, “Ju-do.” You get it? Jew do. Ju do. That’s how he pronounced judo. I think. You can’t plural ju-do as jus-do. That’d kill the pun. You have to read it. Some things in life only work in writing. Which is why my doctor writes the prescriptions. 
The Mountains- Where Jews go for the summer and the only mountains in the Oylam. The ‘world’ being New York. Where Yiddishkeit is based. A Jewish city, in the summer The Mountains is part of Brooklyn. Affectionately called the Catskills for those purchasing postcards, The Mountains must be capitalized. See Bungalow for how giving up a three-million-dollar home for a shack makes sense. See Goyim for people who still don’t realize The Mountains is part of Brooklyn, and a nation who is trying to figure out how traffic got to Monticello.
Show was amazing... Looking forward to sharing laughs with your community. Shoot an email to [email protected] to bring David out for laughs and song.
With the Maccabiah, questions of Bitul Torah come up. Bitul Torah, wasting time from learning Torah, is something we don’t do as Jews. And there are many reasons given for this. The most convincing one being not getting your allowance.
The Maccabiah needs more Torah involved. Excessive sports is Bitul Torah. I support gymnastics. But you can’t just have gymnastics. One must be learning Gemara when competing on the bars. As part of Color War, we always had a Bracha Bee. The Maccabiah. athletes from the different countries should be competing at Tefilat HaDerech. And it’s practical for their trip home. Categories
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The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire written by David Kilimnick and poorly edited by David Kilimnick.
So, blame his pseudonyms.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to share ideas, make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
The Kibbitzer, where we take Jewish comedy seriously!!! If you are offended, it's satire written by David Kilimnick and poorly edited by David Kilimnick.
So, blame his pseudonyms.
A friend of the Off The Wall Comedy Theater, JHF and The Kibbitzer are here to bring unity and Jewish connection for you, in honor of Rabbi Kilimnick ZT"L.
The Kibbitzer is Funded by the JHF (The Jewish Humor Foundation) and you.
Contact us to share ideas, make a donation and to sponsor Harbatzas Tzchok, the spreading of tradition through laughter, with articles or series in honor and memory of your loved ones.
9/9/2025
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