How to Give a Musar Schmooz- Holding Their Attention: A Beginners Guide

by Rabbi David

Last time we spoke of the Shmooz topics. A topic is enough. You tell them they're sinners, they hear that, they got the message. You can end on the topics. Nonetheless, they expect you to talk.
​Now we will discuss how to draw them into the sermon part of the Shmooz, where you delve into the Musar and keep their attention for forty-five minutes to two and a half hours, depending on how much you don't want to learn Gemara at afternoon Seder learning time.
You have the topic. Now you must hold their attention, tell a story, and make sure they understand the topic, the lesson. Here are some attention holding methods I've learned from rabbis over the years.

They already know that they speak Lashon Hara, and they haven't paid their dues. Now, you continue that message for an hour or so.

One way to hold their attention is to repeat the topic many times, in different ways. You tell the students, "You're not learning Torah enough. You skipped class. You missed Gemara Seder on Shabbis. You had a chance to learn over your break. You didn't learn then. You sneezed, which was a chance to learn Torah. But instead, you decided to sneeze. You even got up and got a tissue. More time wasted..." You get creative and before you know it, you've given a whole Shmooz on the topic of not being Mivatel Torah, not wasting time from learning Torah. And the whole time, they've learned no Torah.
The students walk away with nothing, knowing they need to learn. And over that period of your Shmooz, they've learned nothing.

A blank stare works very well for adding guilt. You stare at them for a good hour or so, they'll start to feel like they've done something wrong.
Mastering the stare technique of holding their attention without talking for the duration of your Shmooz isn't easy. However, once you get this down, you come in, you say "Tzedakah," you then look at them for an hour and a half. They'll get the message. An hour fifteen into the Shmooz, they'll be crying, admitting everything they've ever done wrong, due to the discomfort of being stared at. 

The Holocaust. That will get them to listen. A rabbi was giving a Shmooz about the importance of marriage. He lost everybody. Next thing you know, he said, "In the Holocaust..." Nothing to do with marriage or single people. But we were now listening. A brilliant attention grabber. 
If you're ever wondering if you lost their attention, say "The Holocaust" and you will get them right back. That wakes them up. Employ the greatest of tragedies and human suffering, and they will be ready to now focus on the importance of learning Torah and dating. 
It truly gets people's attention. You're giving over the message of charity and kindness. Next thing you know, you've lost everybody. Then you say "Holocaust." Everybody is ready to listen again. Now you can continue with your story about your child's Siddur party.
Only employ the Holocaust when people start to sleep. People hear Holocaust, they wake up. Though, I don't suggest you set your phone alarm to "Holocaust." That's not an easy way to wake up. 

You can bring in Torah. But nobody cares about that. You can mention a commentary like the Ramban. It's good stuff. But it doesn't add to your message. It's better to just say, "Rabbis say that you're a sinner."
Don't get me wrong. Sources are important. You have to let them know you know Torah. Thus, you hand out a source sheet. But it's a Shmooz. So, don't talk Torah. Nobody wants to hear Torah at the Shmooz. Hand out the source and tell them they're not learning it. And it's because they're sinners.

Get loud. A good yell. That gets their attention. That wakes them. Go right up to their face and scream "Torah!!!" They will remember that the next time they're learning Gemara and horrified.
I must say that nothing works better than saying "Holocaust." I personally am against using it, unless if you're talking about the Holocaust. Even so, sometimes you have something you want to share about your upcoming summer learning program, and the Holocaust helps bring home the message Torah and sports.

Choosing the correct method for you is not easy. You have to know your strengths. Myself, personally, my greatest strength is being late. Builds expectation.

Now that you've held their attention by exploiting the Holocaust, next time, we will discuss the telling of the story and how to finish off your Shmooz with a lesson. Ensuring that all the Talmedim feel shame.