Bad Character Traits and People You Don't Want to See at Shul

by Rabbi David

With Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur coming, it's time to look at ourselves and to take an accounting. As such, it's important we focus on others and how they can improve. Many people out there are very annoying. There a lot of people I can't stand.
Here are character traits I've noticed at shul that we have to get rid of. And it seems a lot of people have them.

People who don't say hi. They know me. We Daven together every day. I think they notice me. They must. When I pass them, they seem angrier.
People who say hi in French. What are they trying to prove.
People who say Shabbat Shalom when I say "Good Shabbis." 
People who say Good Shabbis when I say "Shabbat Shalom."
People who say Guten Shabbis. I already said "Good Shabbis." Why are you correcting my Yiddish?! Are there grammatical mistakes in Yiddish?! If I don't read The Forward, are there grammatical mistakes?! In the Satmar community, are they worried about grammar?!
People who say Forvard, that were born in America.

People who correct me, and are not telling me I'm a bad Jew. I'm fine hearing I'm a bad Jew. I need Musar. If you say hi, you can tell me I'm a bad Jew.
Somebody didn't say hi to me the other day and I don't know if I'm going to get over it.
People who smell bad.
People who take off their shoes. This isn't the Temple. Your kid just threw a lollipop and I stepped on it.
People I don't want to say hi to.

People who don't hold the door open. Where are you rushing to? If you're going to shul, you're not running to the sanctuary. If you're a member of my shul, you're not in good enough shape to run.
People who don't say thank you. 
People who I hold the door for who don't say thank you. Every kid in the shul. The not appreciative pieces of Gehenim.
Their parents. By the way, where are they. 
Anybody who's entitled. And I don't think we should give the executive director another raise.
Anybody who is not appreciative. And I'm not talking about Chanukah Gelt. That's not actually money. I just learned about that.
People who don't give a thank you nod. I like thank you nods. I feel they're more universal for those who can't hear. Which is everybody in my shul during Torah reading. All talking very loud. I'll explain. I like people who explain. That takes away the guessing. When they explain, it's clear they don't like me.

People who are too religious. People who are heretics. Anybody who doesn't Daven the way I like.
People who argue with me when I give a Dvar Torah. I know I have no idea what I'm talking about. You can be fine with it too.
People who feel a need to push the idea they have that there's no Gd. And what are they doing in shul?! This is why we have to start charging for potato kugel. People like it. And some of those people don't say Brachas. 
People who ask me for forgiveness and then tell me what they did. That didn't help the relationship.

People who walk in the back of the sanctuary. Get your steps in at home. If you think you’re getting into shape at shul, look around at the congregants. Nobody is in shape at our shul.
People who walk backwards from the ark. And you wonder how people get injured.
Snobby people. How snobby can you be when you're a Frum Jew wearing a white shirt?! The cool cats that have five friends who consider each other cool. Again. You're wearing a white shirt! If not, you're wearing a shirt with colors on it, to stand out. Which means you've went out of your way to be cool, and you're going to Gehenim. Point is, if you're wearing a shirt, you're not cool and you should be accepting of everybody. Point is, don't be an --- ----.

People who don't smile. I know you're not happy. Smile. I'm not happy to have to see you either.
I get it. It's shul. You have to see these people too. Got to put on that smug face, make Davening and life worse. ​Welcome to shul. Where angry people come to pray together, as a community, before Gd.
People who learn too much. They then think it's a good idea for you to learn too.
Kids. How did these guys make it into the community. Kids is a character trait. Also known as people who don't clean up after themselves.
People who don't help. Those are people known as members.
People who take helping too seriously. They scare other people.

People who sit in Maurice's chair. That's Maurice's chair.
People who come in and just sit. You've been coming to shul for eighteen years. You've seen Maurice sitting there for eighteen years. Would you not think that seat is Maurice's. I see a kid winning at musical chairs. I kick them out. Let them know they're inconsiderate. The wayward child.
Any youth director who thinks musical chairs is a fun game. They’re a Rasha.
People who don't say anything to the guy sitting in Maurice's chair.
People who don't say anything when people smell bad. That leads to Lashon Hara.
And then, I'm considered rude for saying something.
People who don't speak Lashon Hara. Ruining every conversation. Keep your not speaking Lashon Hara to yourself. Or don't come to Kiddish.

​The ignoring people. You see me. I see you. The guy didn't say hi to me. I will not let it go.
People who ignore you and then they expect you to want to talk to them. Why? Because a cool guy in a white shirt is talking to you.
People who sit in Maurice's chair. That's Maurice's chair.
Mrs. Feldblum's hat. That's a character trait.

People who take too long with their Davening. They're making you wait. It doesn't take that long to say Shema, if you don't understand it.
People who don't go to the Kiddish table and take as much as they can. They're snobs. Do they think they're better than everybody else, not getting violent.
It's good to get it out.
Not friendly people. Again, we are all religious Jews. If you think you're cool because your Kippah looks like it's about to slide off the side of your head, now do you understand.
People who talk about others. There's a reason. I can't stand them either. This should be allowed.

People who don't visit the elderly. Are you expecting Ethel and Merv to wheelchair themselves out of the nursing home to wish you a Shana Tova?! Ehtel and Merv who bought the shul.
None appreciative pieces of Gehenim. I think I said that. I hope you appreciate my helping you get it out before Yom Kippur.
People who make a turn and don't signal. There is no place in the community of Gd for them.
People who cut off Maurice. 
I am mad on behalf of Maurice.
There are so many more people I can’t stand. If the board would just kick these people out, we would finally witness the redemption.

Truth is, we need these people. Without these annoying people, we wouldn’t have community. We would have nice people who get along. And that’s not a congregation.
Redemption would ruin our membership. I would come to shul, having to see people smiling at me, thanking me for holding the door for them, while they wheel in Ethel for a Yom Kippur Davening that's over in an hour and a half. It wouldn't be shul.
 
Note from me: This statement here is my "Hineni" prayer. It is my pleasure to share it with you, as I lead my flock this High Holiday season. It's my Rabbi Levi Yitzchok of Berditchev prayer on behalf of my congregation.